Hi I'm Nick. I like traveling and making people laugh.
This blog is what happened when I combined the two.

 

 

 

 

 

1
How To Get Rid Of Disappointment
2
Where Does Confidence Come From?
3
What My Mind Is Like When I Meditate For 10 Minutes
4
Relationships, Sex, STD’s, Drugs, and Everything In Between
5
Am I a Bikini Wearing Pedophile?

How To Get Rid Of Disappointment

A few days ago, I needed to transfer money from my Spanish bank account to my U.S. one, to ensure that my debt monsters received their monthly feeding.  I’d done this a few times last year, and didn’t foresee it taking longer than ten minutes. Two hours later, I found myself waiting in line at the bank, laptop in hand, so that I could physically show someone the error message I had received.

As I stood in line, I became more and more frustrated with what I perceived to be each wasted minute of my day: “I should have already gotten groceries, gone to the gym, and cooked lunch by now. Instead, I’m standing in this fucking bank”.

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Where Does Confidence Come From?

Confidence was never something that came naturally to me, and I could never understand why.

I remember trying to reason it out in high school: “How is that kid on the football team so cocky and certain? He’s not even that good on the team and I’m captain of the varsity soccer team. He’s not that smart academically and I’ve got straight A’s in my AP classes (note to self, do not use that as a pick up line). He hardly says anything that funny and I’d like to think I’m a witty guy. Even on the scale of attractiveness (although this is a hard one to be objective about) I’d say we’re about even.

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What My Mind Is Like When I Meditate For 10 Minutes

Okay. Ten minutes of meditation. You’ve got this. Let’s settle down in the corner of the backyard where it’s nice and tranquil. The sun feels warm on my face, there are lots of flowers around – nice, you are one with nature. Let’s set the timer for ten minutes and begin!

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Relationships, Sex, STD’s, Drugs, and Everything In Between

I‘m twenty-four years old and I’ve never been in a relationship. Well, unless you count those fiery three weeks in 6th grade when I dated a girl and we changed our AIM names to things like “ILuvUxoxo143” and I bought her soccer ball earrings for Valentine’s day because I was romantic as shit. But if we erase this fling from the record books, that’s twenty-four years of single solidarity. How did this happen? Because relationships and sex are two of my greatest insecurities and I’d like to tell you how this came to be.

It all started in fifth grade with the discovery of porn. I can still remember the first video that I ever watched: it was this grainy old thing, that looked like it had been filmed with a toaster, of a girl stripping and dancing on a chair. It was glorious.

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Am I a Bikini Wearing Pedophile?

I recently worked at a 2-week long children’s camp in Spain where the hours were, I shit you not, from 8:00 a.m. to 2/3 a.m. when we finished our nightly meeting. There were ten counselors running the camp and in order to maintain our sanity, we played little games with each other throughout the day.

The person who lost the game each day got messed with in some way by the other counselors. The first day, the girl who lost got drawn on with permanent marker (mustache, unibrow, goatee, penis). It was a funny and relatively tame punishment.

I lost the next day. Our camp went to the beach twice a day and it was decided that I would have to wear a bikini and have makeup put on my face. The fuck? That’s quite a difference in degree of punishment. That’s like stealing a beer in the U.S. v.s. in Saudi Arabia: a slap on the wrist or the removal of it.

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