The Pub with Cold Beer

This tale begins somewhere in southern Vietnam. A group of us are trying to get to a place called “The pub with cold beer”. Beautiful name. We rent bicycles and turn down some random dirt path.

On either side of us are old Vietnamese people doing farm work and cows meandering along. After 20 minutes of this we think we’re lost but we finally round a corner and see the mythical pub.

Aside from the beer, the main gimmick about this place is that you can order a chicken and then go out back and kill it yourself. I can’t deal the killing blow, but I do watch them kill the chicken. It’s an interesting experience to say the least. A girl I’m with is nervous and keeps saying “don’t give it a name, don’t give it a name” and then shouts “oh god, she looks like a Rachael!” right before they killed it. It made eating the chicken oddly person.

After we murdered Rachael, we hang out by the bar waiting for our food. It has a pretty nice set up with a volleyball court, a bunch of hammocks, and a pool table. An entire family lives at this “bar,” so there are two little Vietnamese girls running around that are roughly 4 and 6-years-old. The 6-year-old one taps me on the side and asks if I want to play pool. How adorable. I’ll go easy on her.

This girl is a goddamn pool shark. She can barely see over the table but that makes no difference. She is absolutely working me. A few Vietnamese guys gather around and chuckle at my pathetic performance.

playing_pool

As the game progresses, I start to make a bit of a comeback. She has 3 balls left and I have 4. Then she just takes off. I wish had a video of her playing because the description doesn’t do it justice. She spends no time at all lining up her shots. She just walks up to the first one and bam! Straight in. Same thing happens for the 2nd and 3rd balls. I can’t believe what I’m seeing. This 6-year-old girl just hit 3 in a row in 5 seconds flat. She lines up the 8-ball, which is a fairly tricky shot, and lets fly. It looks like it’s going straight in, but at the last second barely lips out of the pocket. She looks devastated about her poor play.

I now have 4 balls left to make and then the 8-ball. There’s a small crowd watching and all of them are rooting against me. To be fair, I don’t even know if I want to win. Beating a 6-year-old in pool isn’t really something you brag about.

I end up going on a run and make my next 4. This is the best pool I’ve ever played and I’m barely even equal to this girl’s skills. At this point, it’s a lose-lose situation. Everybody watching wants to see me lose. If I win, then congrats, you beat a six-year-old girl in a game of pool.

Much to the bar’s displeasure, I sink the 8-ball. The girl is upset because she played down to my level.

Afterwards we make amends and she draws a portrait of me.

The artist mid drawing

The artist mid drawing

The end result

The end result

She really nailed the “hairy-chested pedophile” look that I was going for.

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About the author

Hi my name is Nick Holke

I'm 24 years old and I'm from California. Currently, I'm teaching English in Madrid.

If you wanna know a bit more about me and the website, click here.

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