Hi I'm Nick. I like traveling and making people laugh. This blog is what happened when I combined the two.

 

 

 

 

 

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Thai Massage with a G-Rated Happy Ending
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Whippits and Hospital Visits
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Bangkok Blur: Chicken Nuggets, Arrests, and Ping-Pong Shows

Thai Massage with a G-Rated Happy Ending

It’s my second day in Chiang Mai, Thailand and I spend most of it walking around the city checking out temples. It’s exhausting and I decide to treat myself to a Thai massage. And yes, just a massage. Perverts. I don’t have many lines, but paying for sex is one of them. Besides, I’ve never really understood the point of a handjob. Why let a girl make a mockery of something that I perfected in the 6th grade?

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Whippits and Hospital Visits

I’m walking home late at night in Bangkok when a ladyboy (another word for a transvestite) walks straight up to me and attacks my genitals. Dear god his(its?) hands are powerful. Feel emasculated. Freak out and push away. I start walking and reach into my pockets. Realize wallet is gone. Cheeky bastard pick pocketed me. Apparently the maneuver is balls with one hand, flip out wallet with the other.

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Bangkok Blur: Chicken Nuggets, Arrests, and Ping-Pong Shows

The following is the story of my flight and first night in Bangkok, Thailand. Enjoy.

8:14 a.m. – I had spent the past week in Hawaii with my family so leave from there. Fly for 8 hours with tiny Asian girl in the seat in front of me who looks just like the kid from Monsters, Inc. Freakin’ adorable. She cries for an hour straight. I hate her. She starts watching Frozen on her laptop. She is adorable once more. Secretly watch movie through gap in seats. Great flight.

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